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I had an 'A-ha' moment and it wasn't very pretty

Feb 04, 2020

I had an “A-ha” moment this week. 

Okay, it was more like an “I can’t believe I do that” moment. 

Let me explain. 

I am a Business Coach and a certified Life Coach.  I pride myself in knowing how our brains work.

Here's the problem, sometimes my own brain trips me up.

I hate it when that happens.

When I had my “A-ha,” I got curious.  I wanted to know why I was doing this. My curiosity led me to Carol Dweck’s book, Mindset.

Let me explain.

In her book, Dweck writes about her research on Fixed vs. Growth Mindset and how people use these in their life.

Fixed Mindset is a belief that your qualities are set in stone.  Your intelligence, your personality, your moral character. 

Whereas, Growth Mindset is a belief that your basic qualities are things that can be cultivated through your efforts, your strategies and help from others.

Let me give you an example, IQ test results.  Most...

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Stuck in indecision?

Jan 28, 2020

Just make a decision.

Yes, it is really that easy.

Don’t believe me?  Let’s look at some reasons why…

Number one, making decisions saves time and mental energy.

Being in confusion by telling yourself  "I don't know," wastes your time and mental energy. And ultimately, you stay stuck.

But here's the thing, not making a decision is actually a decision in itself. 

Number two, making decisions increases your action. 

Many of you are not taking enough action towards the things that you want.

You are saying that you're confused, you're saying that you don't know 'how', or you're hemming and hawing over what to do and which decision to make, which means you're not putting any contribution out into the world.

When you start taking action, you learn so much. And you participate in the world and you show up in a better way.

Number three, making a decision increases your growth. 

The way that you evolve is by expanding your experience both...

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Feel the fear and do it anyway!

Jan 21, 2020

Are you willing to be uncomfortable on purpose?

As an entrepreneur, my guess is that you answered yes to that question.  I mean, you did start your own company. That is not a feat for the faint of heart!

But what about when it comes to leading your team?  Do you dive headfirst into the areas of management that make you uncomfortable?

Are you a courageous leader?

It takes a boatload of courage to lead a team effectively.    Most leaders fail because they choose not to do things that are unknown and super uncomfortable.

Think about it…

You need courage to decide it is time to hire a team even though you have never managed anybody before. 

You need courage to choose between two qualified candidates. 

You need courage to slow down to set processes and expectations for your team.

You need courage to trust your team with tasks you used to handle yourself.

You need courage to hold your team (and...

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I don't know what to do.

Jan 14, 2020

How many times have you said this exact sentence?  Too many times to count?

This is what our brains do. When faced with a challenge, our brains will default to confusion.  Thoughts like “I don’t know where to start.” “I don’t know what to do.” “This is so overwhelming.”

The result?  We stay stuck.

What if you did know what to do?

When faced with a decision, rather than allowing your brain to default to indecision.  What if you asked yourself, “If I did know what to do, what would I do?”

Now your brain has something to work with – a problem to solve.

Here’s a little secret…

You do know what to do. Honestly, you do.  You need to allow your brain to noodle around with the problem.

How do you do this?  Give your brain time and space to think.  Literally.

Here a couple of things to try:

Go old school. Get out a pen and some paper and start writing.  This is by far my...

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what's the word?

Jan 07, 2020

Intentional. 

That’s my word for the year.  I didn’t know I was going to have a word but there you have it.  It came to me as I was planning out 2020 and deciding how I wanted to show up this year.

Intentional.

That word feels SO GOOD to me.  Have you ever had THAT feeling?  Sometimes it’s a word or maybe a phrase that helps you remember who you want to be, how you want to show up in life.  I like having something to remind me because sometimes…

I forget.

I want to be intentional in all things this year.  In the way, I approach my business, my family, my friends, my health, YOU…myself.

As many of you know, my phrase for last year was “Shitty First Draft”.  That is what got me motivated to finally start my own business.  It took the pressure off.  It reminded me ‘done is better than perfect’.  It reminded me that if I didn’t start now it probably would never happen.

...

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a word of caution

Dec 31, 2019

It’s New Year’s Eve!  YAY! πŸŽ‰πŸΎ

This is the time of year people like to go BIG.  Champagne and ball dropping aside. I am talking about setting goals for the upcoming year.

🚧proceed with caution🚧

You know the statistics.  For many, those goals are going to be just words on a piece of paper…a distant memory…a reason to beat ourselves up.

Let this year be different.

Remember when I hosted ‘Take Action August’.  What was the biggest thing I stressed in every single Facebook live?!?

Working on one thing at a time.πŸ”₯

Yes, just one.

Laura, I know, I know.  Slowing down is SO hard.  You are motivated and you may be thinking “Jen, this is the New Year.  It is going to be different. I got this"

Um, you’re human.

Unless you’re going to approach your goals differently this year.  Ain’t nothin’ gonna change.

Sorry.😏

BUT if you listen to me and...

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slow down you move too fast..

Dec 17, 2019

"Slow down and notice what thoughts come up."
                                                                  ~my yoga teacher

The yoga class I take on Fridays isn't one of my favorites.

OK. I dread it.

It's hard – like 'your muscles are shaking the entire class' hard.

The flow of her class is really slow. We hold the poses – FOREVER. And as she guides us through each pose, she says things like "slow down and see what thoughts come up." Followed by an audible breath

– a slow one, of course.

And yes, I have LOTS of thoughts. Most of which include a bunch of these *&#%$! However, now and again, I think, "I can do this. I can do hard things."

And somehow I get through the pose.

I am getting stronger. And so week after week, I continue to go to class and curse, um, I mean, breathe.

This past...

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Got 2020 Vision?

Dec 03, 2019

A coaching colleague of mine was telling me about the '2020 Vision' workshop she recently held for her clients. 

OMG, she's so clever!

Get it? 2020 Vision.

I love it!

 

Yes, my friends, it is THAT time of the year.  We are now in the last month of the year and DECADE

Time to get planning.

As you set goals for the upcoming year, it is also the perfect time to revisit the vision statement you set for your business to make sure it is still relevant.

Are you thinking? Vision? What VISION?

Don’t panic.  Nothing has gone wrong.

If you don’t have a vision statement for your business, you don’t need to pack up and go home.

Just write one now.

Listen, I only just got clear on my vision this past month.

As I moved through this past year, I allowed myself to operate without a clear vision for my business because I couldn't see where I was headed.  See what I did there? :-)

When I started, I had an idea of what my...

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do you remember...

Nov 26, 2019

…when you were excited about your business?

Think back to the day you decided to step into your dream and start your own business.  What were you thinking?

‘I am finally going to be my own boss.’

‘This is such a great idea!  People are going to love it.’

‘I can’t wait to make a lot of money.’

‘Freedom! Freedom! Freedom!’

 

Still feel the same way or is it more like...

 

‘There's just not enough time in a day.’

‘Why can’t my team just do what they are supposed to do.’

‘It’s easier to just do it myself.’

‘Maybe being my own boss was a bad idea.’

‘I have no idea what to do next.’

 

What happened? 

 

My guess is success. Your business grew.

Yay!

But did you grow along with it?

When you were working for yourself, you only needed to worry about...well...you.

But now you have a team and that means you are working...

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Leaves on snow?!?

Nov 12, 2019

We had snow twice this week - TWICE!

I get it. I live in Wisconsin but...

COME ON!

I found myself (and heard a lot of others) complaining about it being too soon for snow.  

Um...did I just do it again?

How often do you find yourself wishing for things to be different than they are?  

"I wish I had more time in the day."

"I wish my team just knew what to do."

"I wish I could actually work normal hours so I can actually have a life."

When we get caught in the mental tug-of-war between what we want life to be vs. what it is, we lose every time. AND we waste a ton of mental energy on things we can't change rather than focusing this energy on the things that we can. Like...

~ Managing yourself around your time.

~ Managing your team by setting expectations and holding them (and yourself) accountable to those expectations.

~ AND prioritizing your health over everything else because, without your health, you ain't got nothin'

Rather than wishing your life away, I...

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